Hanging In

So what - it's like day 15?? Still hanging in there although I have to be honest - I haven't been following the plan to the letter. But I'm definitely not eating like I was before I started. And my blood sugar is still better so thank goodness for that. I'm watching Bridezilla and one of the Bridezillas is named Magdalena. It used to be that I was the only Magdalena around. And now I know 2 others in my own life plus there's this chick. And every time they say her name I get this strange feeling. When I was younger, I hated that my mother called me Magdalena. Especially when she called out the window for me to come in..."Mag-da-LAY-na!!!" I always preferred being called Maggie. But as I got older I really started liking my unique name. And now that my Mama has passed, I love it even more. I went to Catholic school and everyone from there always called me Magdalena - nicknames weren't allowed. That comes in handy because every once in a while I'll run into someone who looks familiar and I won't know where I know them from until they say my name - if it's Magdalena I know it must be from Catholic school. I miss my Mama. I can't believe that she's been gone 9 years! It seems like only yesterday and yet there are times when I feel like it's been forever! I wish she could be here to enjoy our new house and her 3 grandkids. Max has her eyes! I love that he has her eyes. Baby J is a little light-headed blue-eyed cutie - like the 3 girls we used to babysit for whom my mother regarded as grandchildren. Angelina is a Mini-Me so it would have been cool to ask her how similar we truly are. You know - it's really sad but there's like only two people alive in the whole world who have known me since I was a baby. That would be my God-Mother, Tia Maddy and her sister Tia Carol - and they live in Mexico. My Mom, Maddy and Carol were buddies in High School, I guess. They worked at the 1964 World's Fair. They apparently frequented the Mexican Pavilion a lot. That is where my Mother met my Father. He was a musician with the Mariachi band which was representing Mexico at the pavilion. They met, fell in love and soon, Mom, Maddy and Carol went to Mexico to live. Maddy and Carol met other Mexican men and they married them and have been living there ever since. I was originally going to be named after Jacqueline Kennedy Onasis but at the last minute my mom decided to name me after Maddy and Carol, although she decided to "Mexican" the names up - hence Magdalena Carolina. My mother and father didn't work out but I was already on the way and Maddy and Carol were there to help my mom get through the challenging time. I really need to call Tia Maddy - before it's too late. I had been in touch with her about 5 years ago and her step-daughter, Lila, sent me all her girl clothes for Angelina. That was very sweet. Lila is in fact my oldest friend - the only friend I'm still in contact with from my years in Mexico.

Day 7 & 8

Well, finished off the first week of Phase 1 and it looks like I lost 5.4 pounds. Not bad! Today (day 8) has been weird - I woke up late and I tried to get my breakfast together before I took Max to school and Angie to dance class. Sadly, I was trying to hard-boil eggs (as opposed to poaching which I knew I shouldn't try while on the fly - especially since I've never done it before), but my eggs cracked and oozed out of the shell. Yuck. So I didn't end up eating until it was lunch time. But hopefully that won't affect me too much.

Mostly today I'm really tired from staying up too late - dumb me. But sometimes I just can't get to sleep early when I feel it's the only time I have to myself. Even just to read blogs, play Bubble Trouble or just think. But of course if I get better sleep, then I feel much better and then I have a more productive and pleasant day. Oy this working on me thing is harder than I thought. And right at the moment we are experiencing a frightening shortage in cash which stresses me out which makes me want to eat and also isn't too good for my bloodsugar. Ah well - I know this, too, shall pass. I'm a worrier at heart - I worry about worry even. I'm trying to take it down a thousand. That's part of my plan, too. Take a tip from Bobby McFerren - "Don't worry, Be Happy" - You 80's folks will know what I'm talking about. We'll see what happens. I wonder if I can link that song to this post. I will figure out how to do it and come back and edit it another time.

Day 6

Well, today was a little less crazy than yesterday. Although I didn't follow everything to the letter. I had a tiny bit of the pizza crust that I made for the kids - I mean like a half a bite. And I skipped lunch because I woke up late and everything was off. But I ate most of the food that I had planned on and my blood sugar was pretty good so I'm happy.

I was just looking at the pictures on Rosie's website - her kids are getting so big! And they are so cute! I'm thinking that Vivi looks a bit like my Baby Jacqueline - but Vivi is a bit older and much blonder. Rosie and Kelli's kids are kinda like mine - 3 look alike and one is completely different. My Max and Angie could be twins, both with brown hair and dark eyes. Baby J has these amazing blue eyes and the lighter hair. It's all so odd since she looked just like Max when she was born. Go figure! Actually she resembles Jeff's grandma who passed away shortly before Jacqueline was born. Especially when she's pissed! Grandma was wonderful but she was also quite grumpy. Anyhoo - here's a picture of our kiddies taken last year - it's one of my very favorite ones of them together. Baby J is almost 18 months old now but I just love this shot!

Days 2-5 - so far so good!

Well, it's been a bunch of days. I have been cooking my little head off especially with Jeff working some overtime. I'm tired of cooking - this eating healthy stuff really takes a lot of time and money - especially when one's trying to make multiple meals for hubby to take with him. But overall we've been doing pretty well. I weighed myself and it seems as though I've already lost 4 pounds. Most importantly, my blood sugar is below 200! And it won't be long before it's in the normal range. I'm most psyched about that. Anyhoooo - I'm really tired and so I will crawl up to bed and sleep the sleep of the tired. OY - I'm losing it. Good night!

Day One

Well - yesterday went pretty well. The food was delicious and I felt pretty content the whole day. The best part is that this morning was the first in a very long while that I had a fasting blood sugar under 200! I know any diabetics will be horrified - it's still too high - but it's much better than it has been in the past and I'm very happy! I'll keep working to get it back to a normal range. Jeff did okay, too, but he had a little extra food - even a bit of sour dough bread - but he insists he needs more food because he does strenuous work. In any event we're still eating way better than we used to! Yay!

Alright - gotta get my snack - a wedge of Light Laughing Cow cheese on some celery. You'd be surprised how yummy that is.

South Beach - PA

Well today was a marathon day. My hubby, Jeff, and I are starting the South Beach diet later on today and because he'll be working all day I had to prepare his whole day of food for him to take with him. That's in addition to the regular cooking I had to do for the kids. And of course I had to take our son, Max, to school (and pick him up). And I took our daughters, Angelina and Jacqueline, to the library for Story Time. Then it was off to the supermarket to buy the stuff for the diet. I only bought the stuff for the first 3 days (plus some cheese and some gum) and it cost $114. That's one hundred and fourteen dollars - American. For 3 days worth of food. Why, oh why does it have to cost so much more to eat healthy?!?!?!?! It's crazy!!

Meanwhile my bloodsugar is still high - although not as high as it was last week. I'm trying to get a handle on it because I've been out of control for a long time. When Nell Carter died and was found by her kids I had vowed that I would get my act together and of course I didn't. Now Luther has died and although they don't say exactly what happened, they attribute it to his stroke which they attribute to his diabetes. Diabetes - not a joke. And yet I have not taken it seriously except for the three times when I was pregnant. It's stupid, really. But now I'm trying to forgive myself for the stupidity and am working to get it under control. Normally I'm a big fan of Weight Watchers - had some success with it some years back - lost 70 pounds. But now with the Diabetes I need something that controls the sugars and the South Beach Diet seems to help regulate them. So we'll see.

This is it....

Wow - this is very exciting! I wasn't sure that I wanted to enter into this blog world. I mean it's so exposing yet so very liberating. I've always been one to have great thoughts and never follow through. Then, looking back I'm often regretful. Remember that episode of Seinfeld where George decided to do everything the opposite way than he normally would do it and he found he was much more successful? Yeah, I'm thinking I should try that. I'm tired of not being courageous. I'm tired of being fearful. I'm tired of worry. I don't want to be mediocre!!! I'm too stressed out. I want to scream!

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

That feels a bit better.